From my Facebook status on March 2011: “I have really bad days, weeks sometimes. I am unmotivated, I yell at my children, I say the F-word all. the. time. I get into fights with my husband, I have credit card debt - again, I let my kids watch too much TV and play violent video games, I obsess about getting cancer, I can't stop interrupting people, I pass judgment on the people I love the most, I spend time on the internet instead of being productive, I eat too much junk food, I say I'm going to paint, but I keep making excuses, and last week I almost ran away from home....but instead I made a joke about joining the circus. Do you really know who anyone is just by reading their posts!?”
It's Sunday Confession and I admit I am being far too open about it. I confess that I am too quick to proclaim my great ambitions, yet slow on the follow through. I confess that I am still intimidated by a blank canvass and scrapbooking is a comfortable place to be. I confess that I am still guilty of the internet time suck. I confess that I make inspirational moments sound so much easier when I write than I can actually pull off in my daily routine. I confess that at some point I will blog about the tedious day-to-day and what my kids are doing despite stating this was not the blog for that. I confess that I love knowing people are reading what I have to say because I like “putting on a show,” in words of course.
"The lady doth protest too much, methinks." I believe that identifying who you really are also means looking at your flaws. Maybe it’s not necessary to leave my dirty laundry airing for the public to see, but it’s freeing in a way I can not describe. We are not perfect people. I hope that for a brief moment, someone out in the cyber world reads my words and sighs in relief knowing they are not alone in the pitfalls of this human life. For those who keep it bottled up and buried at the bottom of the sock drawer, I suggest you start by being honest with yourself about who you are and where you are in life. Then turn to the people that are closest to you and do the hardest thing; admit your faults. You won’t melt, and it truly does matter. Follow by letting it go, because there is no place for guilt. Change the action or change the belief.
So, there you have it: My Sunday Confessional. You don’t have to confess anything! But you only have five days until the tenth….so leave your list of ten on my last post before it’s too late! (Oh for heavens sake! If I can admit all that I have, it makes your part easy as pie!) One more thing before it’s too late – gratuitous pictures of the people that matter most to me:
"Can you lie next to her and confess your love, your love? As well as your folly and can you kneel before the king and say ‘I’m clean’" - Mumford and Sons, White Blank Page